MANIA!!!

So odd for me how easy it is too string together endless words expressing my hidden emotions when I am anywhere but up up and away! Then when I start to ascend I begin to sail categorically out of control causing everlasting damage whatever path I may have chosen to take this time around. When I descend back to reality, looking back at yet another catastrophe left with a devils touch, I am always left bewildered. Am I really responsible for ALL this?
Posting in a blog does help with dealing with every day emotions, but I have found it helps chart moods without even trying as well. I write when I am down or in a mixed state. Therefore, regrettably it is easy to look back on when my last post was and like a brutal slap on the face I can see exactly when things started to swing. I judge things by situational circumstances, then start taking a look around me, and ask myself why am I writing again? It’s like holy fu*k! Not again.
Med changes! Therapy! Anxiety! Depression! Getting back on track and revisiting my comforting place…my dark place…my best friend!
Hope everyone has been well!
Bipolar is a bitch!

Magnificence (Poem)

Know that you’re crazy is beautiful
because it makes you YOU
wear your skin like a cozy blanket
in the warmth of yourself
you are not broken
but scattered like the night
with pieces like stars shining
open your pain and yourself
to the wound of the world and heal
and choose…
@Touching Madness 

Lunacy (Poem)

Even through deafening silence
An ever-lasting voice occurs

The loudest sounds cannot thwart
Such a disquieting murmur

The intonation is not continuously the same
But it is disguised in order to confuse 

Paranoia inhabits the psyche
Right and wrong become complexities

What is actual and what is simulated, 
Grow difficult to decipher 

Insanity finally settles in
Irrevocable damage has finally been attained 
Struggles between life and death 
Grapple between one another incessantly 
@Touching Madness 

A World Beneath Me (Poem) *Trigger*

Thrown over a curvature
the twine sway to and fro
shadows of a silhouette are cast
steps to peace are propped
bound limbs to confine
maybe four or five rungs to go
crying eyes closed for the last time
conclusive thoughts of a pained existence
thrust forward knocking all support away
deep panicking gasps for any air
at last fear fades away with consciousness
in the end, a break of the décolletage
and finally, alas, no more bloody tears…
@Touching Madness

Torn (Poem)

Lift your spirits to soar across eternity
shrieking madly at the hollowing sky
surrendering to your ecstasy
emotions exuding your euphoria
reaching the perilous mountain’s summit 
Screeching into a grim unwavering impasse
Time ceases to exist; all horrors settle before you
nightmares become all too palpable tragic ordeals
aspirations fade as the shards of a mind hopelessly shatter
another existence strives for just one more day

The hardship is yet another caged bird
only the conscious can set another free
chant ataractic assonances to oneself
exonerating further nameless miserable souls
mixed confusion coquetting with one more puzzled psyche
 

@Touching Madness 

A Flutes Last Solo (Poem)

Escape from Reality
hide from all the pain
I can’t be a fatality
I must remain Sane 
Hold up others mentality 
this is the way it has to be
I must forgo my mentality
for this place is plain to see

A truth left untold
others mustn’t foresee 
at least until I am old
then I can drift into the sea 

@Touching Madness 

Absolute Lunacy (Poem)

If one listens intensely enough
the walls practically speak
the wretchedness that has occurred
can unmistakably be heard through noiseless whispers
Ever-apparent dungeons of individuals’ minds
are the catacombs that cannot be unlocked or understood
mental anguish is a common place to all its inhabitants
which exist collectively, yet are so far removed from each other
The rage and desolation that scream so loudly
are partially of what in actually is taking place within
the uncharacteristic manifestation this place exhibits
cannot in all probability, impartially display the true faceless demons that reside here
The cries of distress are merely
intense desires that the torture will depart
when the consciousness collects
aspirations realize that for the true persecution to vanish
So, must they…
@Touching Madness